My daughter the socialite
Cassie is only six years old and completely vulnerable and helpless in her father's eyes. He refuses to see her as the growing girl she is, opting rather to acknowledge only the traits that remind him of her as a baby. She adapts her personality to the people she's with at the moment. Sharp of intellect and with savy observational skills, she knows how to endear herself to anyone. She creeps around the house dragging her 'snuggly' and Meekins, her very best stuffed animal friend. Who wouldn't melt at such a site as Cassie crawling up on your lap, batting her long eye lashes and pretending to be a whimpering puppy, extracting every ounce of gushing love you had? But I see her when she ventures out to play with the older girls in the neighborhood. 8 to 10 year olds. They are good girls and Cassie is much like their pet at times, hanging on them in the deepest throes of hero worship. After just a week with these girls she came home asking for a pair of high heeled shoes. I didn't think they made them for 6 year olds, but, you guessed it, they do. They can't be more then an inch and a half high but the hot pink and white mules are as trendy and daring as you'd expect. Cassie teeters to and fro in them and I hear myself saying over and over again 'Don't sprain your ankle in those things!' She wants to be like her friends, wearing heels and dragging around purses with nothing but gum and lip balm inside. In just the few short weeks we've lived here my darling baby girl went from mostly indoor activities and scheduled play dates to running the neighborhood, stuffed animals in tow, daily picnics on the neighborhood lawns with any child who happened to smell the fresh baked chocolate chip cookies and wandering for hours two doors up and two doors down ( the distant boundaries of a 6 year old socialite). She's growing up. It delights me and frightens me so. With news of little Destiny Norton being murdered by the next door neighbor, it's hard to give her room to play and experience life outside the confines of my fierce protective presence. But I want her to LIVE. I want her to touch the world and grow without restraint into a joyful, life embracing human being that sees the beauty in our world, not just the fear. I wonder if my struggles will ever end.........?
posted by Deanna Gomes Photography at 8:09 AM
1 Comments:
I myself find my 5 year old daughter growing up just as fast. It seems like just yesterday she was always climbing up in our laps wanting a hug or a kiss or just to sit next to us to feel that one security that she knows she will always have from me or her mother. After the influence of older teenagers around her and the shows like Hannah Montana coming on Disney, she has made a 360 degree turn in her way of growing up. It's no longer lets have a tea party with her baby dolls or playing with building blocks or even playing make believe in an innocent way. She has overnight picked a make believe boyfriend named ‘Jack Ryan’ and says she’s going to marry him and have a baby. She acts like a Diva when you take her picture, wears those same play high heels that you mentioned in your column and wants to wear these low-cut tank tops that older girls wear. My other 3 daughters are grown and married. They never strayed away from growing up slowly and than getting married after they were of normal age. Sara is different, she is 5 years old going on 15. Anyone around her thinks she has to be 6 or 7 when they meet her as she is tall and very smart for her age. She has been subjected to normal adult talk for the most part of her live and brought up in Las Vegas. Just until the last year; she had no other kids to play with except for holidays or special visits. Every night we do have our bedtime stories and our bedtime saying: ‘Good night, sleep tight, don’t let the bed-bugs bite’. We have made a nightly ritual between us in using this special saying along with our special words of ‘I love you daddy’, ‘I love you mommy’ and ‘I love you Sara’. My 4 grandchildren being between the ages of 5 and 11 yrs of age have not grown and matured mentally the same as her and were brought up in a very small town. I sometimes wonder if our society in a whole needs to find a way somehow to slow down the pace in our lives, take time to smell the roses with our children more often and give back our kids their needed youthful childhood. Their need to invent make-believe fairy tales, the need of old fashion nurturing to keep their innocence so that they can mature at a reasonable pace as they grow older. I wonder everyday if we pushed to fast in teaching our daughter how to become a ‘little lady,’ that she missed out in being able to be just our 'little girl'.
I will always love you Sara, love Dad…
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